A Candid Conversation Around Fertility and Conception - Plus IVF, IUI and All That Comes With It

A Candid Conversation Around Fertility and Conception - Plus IVF, IUI and All That Comes With It

OB/GYN and fertility specialist Dr. Lucky Sekhon and Nanit parents, Ashley Spivey Quynh Dang get honest about the stigma of conception, plus secondary infertility and that magic conception window.

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Parenthood is an incredible journey, but it’s also really overwhelming. For new parents, especially, navigating the endless stream of conflicting advice, coupled with sleepless nights, and constant firsts - it often feels like every time we think we’ve got “it,” it totally changes.

That’s why Nanit is thrilled to bring you our Parent Like a Pro Summit, where Nanit’s experts and ambassadors come together for curated conversations about sleep, parenting, and more. Think of it like that expert best friend in your ear who’s got the answers to your most profound questions before you even know what to ask. 

Catch OB/GYN and fertility specialist Dr. Lucky Sekhon, Nanit Parent and goodfluencer Ashley Spivey, and Nanit's own Quynh Dang for an open discussion about fertility and trying to conceive. Topics include ovulation and cycles, common misconceptions about fertility, the IVF process, mental health + relationships, and more! Knowledge is power. 

Here are the key takeaways.

On Mental Health While Trying to Conceive

“Getting professional help early on is always helpful. It might feel like just another thing on top of all the other appointments, but I've never had a couple turn around and say they regret doing it.” - Dr. Lucky

On the “Magic Window” of Conception

“There's a lot that has to line up perfectly, and the window of opportunity lasts only for 2-3 days. A lot of people don't know about that, but it's shocking! Getting pregnant is highly inefficient. Fertility is a time sensitive thing. Even when we try to force it, it doesn't always work. It can just take a lot of ovulations for that one lucky egg.”  - Dr. Lucky

On Ashley Spivey’s Pregnancy Journey

“I got pregnant quickly after I removed my IUD, but then I had a miscarriage, then a failed IUI, then Covid-19. I got pregnant unassisted but then he passed away. Dr. Lucky reached out and said that when I’m ready, we'll talk about what my next steps can be. Starting IVF around that time was a way to feel like I was doing something, while also giving myself time to rest and recover physically and mentally.” - Ashley 

On IVF’s Effects on Mental and Physical Health

“IVF is a mental health issue and every pregnancy has a bit or a lot of PTSD. It’s very different for different people, but the vast majority of patients would do it again. It's a very low risk short lived procedure.” -   Dr. Lucky

On the Logistics Around IVF 

“In some ways, it was preparing me for parenthood because of the scheduling and the need to be on top of everything. It really marked a shift in how I was prioritizing things. In some ways, it was already the beginning of my new life.”- Quynh 

On Secondary Infertility

“It’s a really common and lonely problem. People don't provide as much support for secondary infertility. It's very painful to not feel as embraced by the TTC/fertility community because"at least you have what you have." - Dr. Lucky

On Deciding Between IUI and IVF

There are who major fertility treatment buckets, each with different pros and cons and subdivisions: 

  1. IUI (Intrauterine Insemination): Medication to help you ovulate more regularly or ovulate a few extra eggs, plus insemination (wash, concentrate, inject sperm at the top of the uterus so it has less distance to travel). Go into it mentally prepared that this may be tried for 2,3,4 rounds, and it increases your chances a few percentage points, but it has diminishing returns after six attempts. It’s more laid back, lower tech, but can weigh on people mentally because it's the same thing over and over.
  1. IVF (In Vitro Fertilization (IVF)): It’s lots more shots, followed by egg retrieval procedure (day off + recovery day), then the waiting game. You'll have multiple eggs, so despite all the drop off that normally goes on, you’ll typically still end up with multiple embryos. From there, we test embryos and select the best one to transfer. It’s generally more successful than IUI, and you can freeze the additional embryos. You can also revert back to IUI after IVF. 

On fertility care and considerations

“There are a lot of OBGYNs doing a great job, but there is a lot of variability. In a similar way that we made a huge push towards oncologists to talk about fertility, it should become a standard of care with general OBGYNs to include it as part of the conversation, because it's so time sensitive. It’s really crucial information.” - Dr. Lucky

Nanit is dedicated to delivering high-quality, reliable content for our readers. Our Parent Confidently articles are crafted by experienced parenting contributors and are firmly rooted in data and research. To ensure the accuracy and relevance of the content, all articles undergo a rigorous review process by our team of parenting experts. Additionally, our wellness-related content receives further scrutiny from Nanit Lab, our think tank of scientists, engineers, physicians, academic experts, and thought leaders.

Our primary objective is to furnish readers with the most current, trustworthy, and actionable information concerning a host of parenting topics. We strive to empower our readers to make informed decisions by offering comprehensive and respected insights.

In pursuit of transparency and credibility, our articles incorporate credible third-party sources, peer-reviewed studies, and abstracts. These sources are directly linked within the text or provided at the bottom of the articles to grant readers easy access to the source material.


Natalie Barnett, PhD serves as VP of Clinical Research at Nanit. Natalie initiated sleep research collaborations at Nanit and in her current role, Natalie oversees collaborations with researchers at hospitals and universities around the world who use the Nanit camera to better understand pediatric sleep and leads the internal sleep and development research programs at Nanit. Natalie holds a Ph.D. in Genetics from the University of New England in Australia and a Postgraduate Certificate in Pediatric Sleep Science from the University of Western Australia. Natalie was an Assistant Professor in the Neurogenetics Unit at NYU School of Medicine prior to joining Nanit. Natalie is also the voice of Nanit's science-backed, personalized sleep tips delivered to users throughout their baby's first few years.

Kristy Ojala is Nanit’s Digital Content Director. She spends way too much time looking at maps and weather forecasts and pictures of Devon Rex cats and no-cook dinners. A former sleep champion, she strives to share trustworthy somnabulism tips with other parents—praying for that one fine day when no tiny humans wake her up while it’s still dark out. Her kids highly recommend 3 books, approximately 600 stuffies, Chopin’s “Nocturnes,” and the Nanit Sound + Light for bedtime success.

Mackenzie Sangster is on the Brand and Community team at Nanit. She supports content development and editing for Nanit’s Parent Confidently blog as well as other marketing initiatives. Outside of work, she enjoys spending time with her friends, cooking, being active, and using the Pro + Flex Duo to keep an eye on her fur-baby, Poppy!

Holly Hays is a contributor and writer for Nanit, channeling her years as a mama and former magazine editor to create fun, useful content for fellow busy, trying-to-do-their-best parents and caregivers. Holly has written for a wide range of brands and media outlets (Ergobaby, HGTV, Manhattan Toy Company, OXO), loves to cook and read mystery novels, and leans heavily on her two daughters to keep her up to date on all the latest slang.